April 21, 2015

Creatively speaking…

Hi.

I’m sort of in the process of rebuilding my life and I’m at a point where I feel I can share my plans with you.

I have a bit of an internet presence…

  1. website
  2. livejournal
  3. twitter x 2
  4. tumblr x 2
  5. friends only facebook that I’ve recently been posting more publicly with
  6. facebook fan page x 2
  7. instagram
  8. youtube
  9.  does snapchat count?

…plus a million other things I’ve signed up for and never used again. The tumblrs and fan pages hardly ever get updated, so let’s pretend they don’t exist for now. YouTube is only used to embed videos in other places, so it’s more of a utility to me than any kind of community that I have to participate in, so take that off the list too. Everything else I use and most of them have some kind of community linked to them that I am part of.

Well, I want to build a new community around myself where my site or LiveJournal is not necessarily the center of it because I don’t think either has been the center in quite a while. I want this community to be built around Patreon, and my creative life, with everything else mostly pertaining to that. But I’ll get to how I plan on using each component after I explain Patreon. 

Patreon is a website that allows me to receive monthly payments from generous patrons who wish to support my work. In return, patrons receive perks, like Kickstarter, and they get to share in the experience of creating some pretty cool stuff, which, if I don’t suck, should give them a little bit of pride of being a patron of the arts and having a hand in whatever crazy thing it it is coming into being! And yes I *am* proud of that run-on sentence!

My first project is a zine that I’m (oh so originally) titling “Textibitionism”. I haven’t really posted anything about it over on Patreon yet (that’s my next  task), but what I envision is 20 individual pieces of paper-based art which tells stories from my life and the things I care about. The original idea was to use traditional scrapbooking materials/embellishments and instead of making typically pretty layouts with smiling children or whatever those happy scrappers do, I would be, well, me. The original idea was also that I would only use materials that I already had, but I already blew that idea out of the water, bigtime. Now what I envision is a mix of altered scrapbook materials, subverted and perverted by my very being, original writings and hand-drawn illustrations. If this sounds good to you, then you should know that almost all pics of works-in-progress, process videos and discussion about this project will be on Patreon, mostly via the patron-only activity feed, which is like a blog with comments and likes. This will be the centre of my creative universe, if the Patreon model of getting money to make art actually works. (We’ll see. I’m not totally convinced. Steph the Geek seems to be doing okay so far, though. Ana Voog and Blake are also using it.) Unlisted YouTube videos, Snapchat (which is where you get videos and pics exclusive to that app on your phone) and private Twitter will be used for daily life stuff for sure, but those media will mostly be where spur of the moment creative thoughts, ideas and work-in-progress photos, things that are pains in my ass etc., will be posted for patrons.

I’ll still be using my main Twitter account and I will (hopefully) only ever have one Instagram account because switching back & forth all the time sounds like a nightmare. LiveJournal is going to continue to be used for the emotional, real life stuff while my site’s updates are basically going to be State of the Union of Sunnyland addresses, linking to everything else once in a while.

I realized when I was in San Francisco that aside from my job, there was very little structure in my life and if my job is any indication, I think I’m less productive as a result. It’s not that I don’t have ideas, I have tons of them, but for a while, whenever I tried to put an idea to paper, I’d start but ultimately lost interest for whatever reason and nothing ever got finished. “Textibitionism”, and the other creative milestones I’ve set for myself on Patreon, is the first time I’ve felt excited and energized about a creative project in a really long time so I really hope that if I make it, I’m not the only one who’s going to see it.

The big picture is that if the zine is well-received, eventually I would maybe like to build Textibitionism.com/.ca/.org where it would be for sale both digitally and hard copy after everyone on Patreon who is supposed to get a copy, does, and the site will have links to all the girls I can find still making and selling zines on Etsy and elsewhere.

The big, BIG picture I’m still working out in my head but there is one. Not giving it too much thought yet though, since so far Blake is my only patron haha

As far as adding structure to my life, today for example, I got off work at noon so I knew I was going to medicate at noon and then write this post directly afterward. I’m falling behind schedule already because I meant to have this done by 3pm but that’s okay. I bought a day planner to help me keep appointments and structure my days to be the most productive I can make them because I’m a freak and I’m happiest, the most emotionally stable and the most satisfied with life when I’m busy creating something, whether it’s writing this post or painting a mermaid. In the past, my creative endeavours have made other people happy too so I’m hoping for this whole thing to be mutually beneficial.

Now I think it’s time to forage for food. Peace oot, homies!

PS. It is a VERY GOOD IDEA to insure your camera equipment, as I found out this week when I realized my camera’s messed up after taking it treetop trekking. I got it insured a few hours before we went! *whew*

April 9, 2015

Okay, Foria fucking WORKS. So why isn’t every woman on the planet talking about it yet?

Last year I heard about this cannabis-infused female sexual enhancement oil, called Foria, that one woman claimed had given her a 15 minute orgasm and thought that it sounded too good to be true. Surely if there was something that gave women a 15 minute orgasm, women everywhere would be clamouring for it. Hell, if it even caused ANY orgasm, women would be clamouring for it, right? Anyway, it wasn’t available here so I kinda just put it out of my mind. That is, until I started planning my trip to San Francisco which was preeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetty much a weed vacation. The ONLY thing I bought there was weed, concentrated weed or things to smoke weed out of/with. Foria was available at one of the dispensaries we were utilizing and I think it was $40 US for a 10 or 15ml spray bottle.

I actually smuggled the Foria home with me because I never felt like trying it when we were in SF and I was pretty sure I could get away with it.

When we got home, I put the Foria in the bedside table drawer where all my toys live, and pretty much forgot about it until Monday night.

First, a little background about me:

– I have been on anti-depressants for the past year that annihilated my sex drive completely that we’ve only begun to wean me off of (by 1/3 so far).
– I have only had one orgasm in my entire life from penis-in-vagina sex and to this day we still don’t know why or how it happened.
– Oral does nothing for me. I mean, it doesn’t feel bad or anything but I’d take a back massage over that any day of the week.
– I can only have clitoral orgasms that I cause myself and when not on shitty anti-depressants, I am multi-orgasmic.
– I am a medical marijuana patient with a ridiculous tolerance to the herb.

I forget whose idea it was, but one of us suggested that since we had nothing better to do, we might as well try the stuff.

In the bedroom, I sprayed my pussy with 8 squirts of Foria coating everything on the outside and a bit of the inside. It seemed like a lot, like my vagine was slick as hell, but it wasn’t lubey, it was silky, then I laid on my side and vaped some cannabis using my Pax, while Blake’s fingers massaged the oil into my skin. After half an hour, the oil was about 3/4 of the way absorbed into my skin and that’s when we started fucking. Nothing fancy, THIS WAS SCIENCE, so just missionary position.

Upon insertion of Blake’s penis into my vagina, I was immediately pre-orgasmic with every movement. From my vagina hole. Not even g-spot stuff, it was like the nerves around my vaginal opening, and about an inch inside, woke up for the first time in my life. Where there used to just be the same feeling as sticking my finger in my ear, there was suddenly a symphony of pleasure, it was crazy. I felt colours and I wasn’t even stoned. Is this what sex is SUPPOSED to feel like? It was actually sort of weird because, while I always participate in sex, it’s never had anything to do with me so movement has always been in response to what Blake wanted to do but with Foria, I kinda lost myself in the moment and turned into a literal greedy fuck where each movement was optimized for MY pleasure. Afterward, Blake even remarked that he could tell something was going on because I, from the bottom, basically controlled everything we did without even realizing it. In fact, I’m a little embarrassed even writing this, but Foria has basically turned me into a cock hungry monster because it’s all I’ve thought about this week but I only have this itty bitty bottle and can’t get more so it’s a special occasion kinda thing until laws change. I have never craved – nor even particularly wanted – dick in my life. I have always, in the back of my mind, wondered if I wasn’t asexual because I was so disinterested in sex. But now every time I look at Blake, all I can think is, “your dick could be in me right now”.

But that was pre-Foria sex. I didn’t think it would do a damn thing and now I’m trying to think of elaborate strategies to make what I have last longer or get more of it.

Now I know that my body is CAPABLE of producing these feelings (and honestly, that’s kind of a relief after feeling defective most of your life) and I know what they feel like, I’m hopeful that eventually body recall could kick in and the Foria would be unnecessary. Like waking a sleeping dragon. But testing that theory would require lots more experimentation.

Having said alllllllllllllllllll of this, I did not have an orgasm (but it felt so good compared to what I’m used to, I ain’t even mad). The Foria did not seem to stimulate my clitoris in any way but that could be due to meds and the fact that my jackpack needs serious replenishing. (Recommend good porn!) My very first thought when we were finished was that if they could get more THC in this stuff, it would DEFINITELY give me an orgasm. From my vagina. No doubt in my mind. I think the only reason it didn’t is because my tolerance is too high. I also no longer call bullshit on the 15 minute orgasm due to this stuff  because I was in the first stage of orgasm the entire time we were fucking so I totally believe that a woman could have a sustained orgasmic experience from using this. Again, no doubt in my mind. That’s why I cannot believe that this stuff is only available in TWO US STATES by prescription. This is all-natural Lady Viagra! Like I said in the beginning, women should be clamouring for this shit the way men went nuts over actual Viagra and change some super stupid laws in the process. I don’t understand why this isn’t happening already! GIRL POWAH! No? :o/

I’m definitely not saying it’s the magical cure-all for every woman (just as I don’t think weed is the magical cure-all for every affliction), there’s not enough evidence to suggest that, but it is absolutely worth trying if you get the opportunity And if you have tried it, I wanna hear about it!

Posted at 6:49 pm in: 4/20 , Blake , Cannabis , Health , Politics , San Francisco , Sex , Spring , USA , winter